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Channel: dissociation – A Year in the Life of PTSD
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a miraculous thing worth mentioning

This past Sunday for the first time as long as I can remember I got out of bed at a reasonable time. I was not super-glued to the bed with fog and dissociation the way I am on most Sundays. I got out...

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some accidental clarity

Ever since I learned of Sara’s passing I’ve been in a foggy dissociative state that’s been confusing for me. Since mid November when I returned to my previous job (which is now my current job, life is...

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I’m going to try again

I’ve not posted on here with any consistency. Unfortunately, that has been by design. I suspect that someone in my life is regularly reading this blog, and knows it belongs to me. However, this past...

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Where is my head?

I’ve been in a roulette of parts moving in and out of my system very quickly. This makes me tired, and fuzzy. It’s not a trigger free world that we live in, and therein lies the challenge. I get...

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A Letter To My Boss

I have dissociative identity disorder. You do not know this, and cannot know this. If you did know this, the pieces of the puzzle would finally fall into place for you. Alas, I cannot tell you. It...

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Dear Boss, today was different.

I’m just as confused as you are. I know you’re dying to ask how one day I can be the gal with the haunted vacant look, moving robotically in the office, steadily working, but trying to stay hidden from...

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Dear Boss, I’m glad you missed all of that

Dear Boss, Today was a crazy banana day. You had some dorky assignment with an expected quick turnaround from the big dogs, and I had to go track down silly attorney dude who keeps bankers hours. We...

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The Black Car

I have found my own modern day hermit’s cave, which I call The Black Car. I work, only because I must. And on days when I have to bring the magic in my job I have one of my parts do the heavy lifting....

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No People

I don’t know how to get out of the cave in which I’ve ensconced myself. It’s almost painful to be around people right now. Yet, I’m acutely aware that I am very lonely. It’s the frustrating paradox of...

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Once again, it has been a while

Although it has been a much longer while since I had any contact with my long ago lost friend, Michael. I should back up a bit. Thursday night, my wife and I were discussing the fact that I’ve had...

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